


Close your eyes (... know I'm here)

by thekathlife



Series: The Sun and the Nightingale [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-29 15:08:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17205677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekathlife/pseuds/thekathlife
Summary: Leliana watches Trevelyan and Josephine dance and can't help but remember her warden.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **AN:** Got a prompt on tumblr and and it gave me the chance to write something at the Winter Palace. Somewhat inspired by this post on tumblr ageofthedragon. tumblr post/106382013707/anonymous-said-leliana-watching-the-inquisitor
> 
>  **Prompt:** Hi! You like Dragon Age right? How about some f!Amell/Leliana reunion?
> 
>  **Edit:** Posted this on FF. net years ago and then forgot about it. Since I got back into the DA fandom I decided to write some more and continue this.

Memories are both an amazing and terrible thing.

Leliana didn't remember where she'd heard the words, but the statement had never been truer than in that moment. Even after Marjorlaine's betrayal and her torture, after escaping and hiding in the chantry in Lothering for years, after the awful things she witnessed during the Blight. She could always live in the moment, think about the future, leave the darkness behind during the day.

But now?

It just wasn't possible. Not when it came to these memories, not when it came to memories of HER. The kind of memories that haunted her, every day. When she would look at a rose and remember that one guided her to her love, or look at the stars and remember a time at camp when she was desperate to find out more about her, find out if she had a chance, and would tell her of Alindra and her soldier, her heart pounding with delight at discovering  _she_ , of all people, was a romantic.

Everywhere she looked, her love would be there if only in memories.

Leliana understood the need to be apart, she had a duty to the Inquisition, her love was trying to find a way to extend their time together…but she missed her so much...

Sometimes, when the pain of their separation brought the redhead to tears, she'd let herself wonder. Wonder what her warden was doing, if she was alright if she thought of Leliana as much as the former bard thought about her. She wondered if maybe, by trying to find a cure for the calling, they were just wasting the time they had left.

Time in which they could be together…

While being apart had been hard from the beginning, frequent letters from her love had helped soothe her heart, and her duties as Left Hand had kept her busy. Until her love traveled too far west and they could no longer maintain constant communication. Not knowing where her heart, her sunlight was… if she was alright… it tormented Leliana with horrible scenarios where her warden was lying in some cave hurt or dying and too far for Leliana to reach her in time.

What if they never saw each other again?

Leliana had faith in her beloved, but as powerful a mage as her love was, she was only human…and she was  _alone_. Alone and probably fighting maker knew what?

And now Justinia was dead.

The two most important people in her life were gone from her side and Leliana's faith was wavering. She wanted nothing more than to be in the loving comforting arms of her warden.

Those thoughts plagued her, especially as she watched the Inquisitor and Josie make eyes at each other for months. They reminded the spymaster of her time with her Warden and sometimes it was as if memories would play out before her eyes, pulling her away from reality. She worried sometimes that insanity was taking over her mind.

It was not ideal for a spymaster to be so lost in memories that she saw things that were not there... or didn't see things that  _were_. And both in dreams and in reality, her mind and heart were far west.

Right now as she looked down from her place in the balcony, watching Evelyn and Josie dance, she could see the memories again… almost completely replacing the sight before her eyes.

…the nights they would dance at camp after her lovely, precious mage had shyly confessed she didn't know how to and Leliana decided it was her duty to teach her. Her warden had been a fast learner and one night during their watch together, she had surprised Leliana by kissing her hand and asking for a dance .

"Dance with me, my lady?"

The redhead shut her eyes tightly, she could almost feel her love's soft hands in her own, their feet moving to a rhythm only they could hear.

But those days were over, at least for now. Who knew when she would return? Or if she even would… if they'd both died and never saw each other again. It almost made Leliana want to leave, forget about her duty to the Inquisition, to Justinia and just go west, go west and not stop until she found her lover again.

Maybe she could save her. Maybe her warm embrace could ground her, her kisses could offer salvation, keep Leliana sane, keep her from losing herself completely…because with out her love, Leliana was lost.

And yet…

How could she? If the inquisition failed then there wouldn't be a world where she and her love could be reunited. If Solona were in her place, she would stay and save the world, how could Leliana not do the same?

No.

Leliana would stay, she would help save the world and then she would join her love. She would join Solona and never part from her again. They had given up so much for duty to the Maker, to the world... they deserved to be selfish for once. To think about their own happiness, that's why Solona had gone in search of the cure in the first place...

Opening her eyes, the spy master looked up into the sky and wished with all her heart. "My love, please come back to me."

"Okay…" A familiar voice said behind her.

The bard gasped and turned around in an instant. Her hand went to her mouth trying to contain the sob that wracked through her body at the sight of a tall woman clad in a formal Grey Warden suit.

"Dance with me, my lady?" Solona asked with a soft smile.


	2. Chapter 2

"Well, I have to say I'm surprised." The inquisitor admitted as she and Josephine joined Cullen, Cassandra Varric and Blackwall. The group was standing by the ballroom's entrance, they were all exhausted and more than ready to leave Halamshiral.

Cullen looked at the Inquisitor and nodded in agreement. "As am I." The commander said while rubbing the back of his neck. "For a while there, I thought the evening was going to be a disaster. Though regardless of our success, I've had enough of this... ' _game_ ' for a while."

"Not to mention your admirers." Varric chuckled at Cullen's groan of displeasure.

Cassandra made a disgusted noise. She had seen the commander's admirers and was glad no one had dared to approach her, the last thing she needed was some Orlesian noble trying to make conversation. "Enough of this, we did what we came here for, it's time to leave."

"I agree." Blackwall nodded. He wanted to leave as soon as possible as being here was dangerous for him. If only the Inquisitor had chosen someone else… but of course, it was either him and Varric or Sera and the Iron Bull. And while she could have brought Vivienne or Solas, the Inquisitor did not get along very well with the Grand Enchanter. Solas, Blackwall didn't know why, had remained at Skyhold as well. And Dorian? Well, the Inquisitor didn't think it a good idea to bring a tevinter mage with them.

At least it was over and they could return to Skyhold.

"Wait." Josephine looked around with a frown. Their group wasn't complete… "Where is Leliana?" She asked, making everyone realize they were missing a spymaster.

"I haven't seen her since before we caught Florianne..." Trevelyan frowned in realization and felt Josephine tense next to her as well.

The ambassador was about to start panicking. They were in Orlais, they'd just finished a very dangerous mission and their Spymaster was nowhere to be seen. She didn't want alarm anyone, but...

"Something could have happened to her." Cassandra frowned. It was suspicious and after everything that had happened that evening… "Someone could have taken advantage of our distraction to get to her."

"Are you certain? Maybe she was distracted..." Josephine said but couldn't quite hide the concern in her voice.

"Leliana wouldn't just get distracted by anything." The Seeker insisted. She had worked alongside Leliana for years now and knew her well. "She would be here giving us her report unless something happened or... We need to find her."

"I agree, let's split up. " The Inquisitor nodded. While it was entirely possible that her spymaster was just busy dealing with any unexpected situation, Cassandra was right… the red head would have said something or sent word… and she didn't see any of her agents around. "Cassandra, come with me and Josephine. Cullen go with Blackwall and Varric... we don't know what happened, so stay with your group. We don't want to be taken by surprise if we're on our own."

**_DADADA_ **

"You...you are..." Leliana stared in disbelief. Surely this was only an illusion, her mind playing a cruel joke on her heart. She had been fearing for her sanity recently...this had to be a dream... "You can't be real..." It was impossible. The Maker took from her these days...he wouldn't give her her joy back.

"I'm here Leli..." Solona stepped closer, she had tears in her eyes as she took in the sight of her beloved. Leliana looked… tired, broken. To others she might look strong and even terrifying, but Solona knew her better than anyone, could see the exhaustion, the pain in her eyes. She slowly raised her hands to cup Leliana's beautiful face, thumbs gently brushing away the tears that had begun slipping down the red head's cheeks.

Leliana gasped at the touch and she trembled as a sob wracked through her body. "You're real..." She wasn't crazy, she wasn't dreaming. "You're back..."

"I'm back, my heart..." Solona pressed their foreheads together, her eyes never leaving Leliana's as she promised. "And I'm never leaving you again." The mage whispered against her beloved's lips, just before she pulled her into a soft kiss.

**_DADADA_ **

They split up, trying to catch sight of the redheaded spymaster, but making an effort not to look like something was wrong. Last thing they needed was for someone to notice something was … besides Leliana was more than capable of defending herself… though Evie  _had_ noticed that the red head had been distracted as of late.

After a while, though just when the inquisitor was beginning to worry that Cassandra would punch someone, she caught sight of something incredible in one of the balconies.

"Oh my!" Josephine exclaimed as she followed Evelyn's gaze.

"Ah, so the Warden finally decided to return." The Nevarran warrior said as she glared at the woman tenderly holding Leliana in her arms. "Took her long enough." While such a sight would normally touch the seeker's heart, Leliana was her friend and Cassandra felt that the spymaster had been waiting for too long.

Evelyn looked between the seeker's disgusted face and Josie's dreamy expression. They couldn't possibly mean… "Warden huh?" Somehow Evie thought the woman would be taller, not that she was short at all… but her tale was so legendary that it made her seem more than human sometimes.

"Oh yes, that's the Hero of Ferelden." Josephine smiled at her. "Leliana has been waiting for so long... I truly hope she brings good news." She wasn't sure Leliana could take more tragedy in her life. If the warden had failed in her mission then the ambassador was sure her friend would completely break.

"Right... the calling." Evelyn suddenly remembered the mission that kept the Hero away from the spymaster. "They don't look sad at all though... maybe she found the cure." She said as she watched the women dance together, very much like she and Josie had done earlier in the evening. They wouldn't be dancing if the warden had returned with bad news, right?

"There you are!"

The three women turned to see Cullen, Blackwall and Varric approaching.

"We couldn't find her, there was simply no trace. I fear she might have been captured-" Cullen was interrupted by the Inquisitor's raised hand.

"It's okay, we found her." The young noble woman smiled mischievously and motioned to the couple dancing in the balcony. "I think our spymaster is just  _fine_  with the person who has... captured her."

The group turned to face the couple and missed the way Cullen's face paled at the sight of a woman he had not seen in years, but who had always remained in his thoughts, dancing very closely with Leliana. "Amell..." He whispered as the dancing couple came to a stop gazing lovingly into each other's eyes.


End file.
